The need to be perfect is physically breaking me down.
Piece by piece... bit by bit.
My mind continues to try and whip my heart into shape.
Discipline and structure.
Discipline and structure.
Structure and fucking discipline.
My heart weeps.
It's cut up and bruised for simply wanting to be free.
Love what it wants to love and do what it was put in my body to do.
My mind is fucked too...
So who gave it this kind of authority?
To boss me around and make me feel unworthy of happiness...
It's always second-guessing and overthinking.
It is making me feel like I'm the crazy one.
The one sitting awake all hours of the night, gasping for air that God gave me to breathe—making me work for something that is free.
My mind tries to make sense of this fucked up world...
But it can't because my mind and heart are one and the same.
They need to work hand in hand to keep everything together.
I'm falling apart and I don't know what steps to take to fix it.
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